The Capricious South Carolinian

Yesterday evening I made the following satirical observation on one of my social media timelines:-

“I’ve just read on Twitter that South Carolina senator, and person who can fit into very small cupboards, Lindsey Graham has contracted COVID-19…. Bearing in mind he’s had his head stuck up Trump’s ass for the past six months, this Delta coronavirus variant must be even more transmissible than first feared…. Rand Paul, Jim Jordan, Ted Cruz, Mo Brookes and the remaining cast of raging sycophants please tread carefully out there!!!”

As an Englishman with no skin in the US political game, my parodying of GOP brown-nosers above was meant as nothing more than an act of mischief.

The observation merely an impish belch in the direction of those who’re oh so desperate to blow smoke up Donald Trump’s supporters asses. Their undignified agendas to further their own careers by enabling the orange fella’s every whim, along with continued perpetuation of the ‘big lie’.

Another reason I chose to share my quip was that I thought it was a decent piece of satire. I was particular pleased with myself for describing Lindsey Graham as a ” South Carolina (SC) senator, and person who can fit into very small cupboards

I’d like to point out at this juncture that SC’s senator contracting COVID-19 isn’t at all funny. And in Graham’s defence his tweet advocating individuals seek coronavirus vaccination, along with setting out the responsible steps he’s taking to avoid further transmission, was admirable.

It’s just a shame many of his fellow Trumpian cucks prefer to avoid the science and turn the vaccination debate into a subject with which to score political points….. For God’s sake, you’re f***ing with peoples lives here folks!! ….. What the bloody hell is wrong with you!!

If you’re so desperate for a fib fix, spout your lies on other less serious issues. Don’t jeopardise thousands of your population’s existences through relentless misinformation about pandemic management. Your misguided agenda driven through self-indulgent desire to receive Trump’s endorsement in 2022 and 2024…… A scenario which, in my book, puts blood on your hands.

If there’s any proof needed about the lack of intellectual wherewithal of the type of fans Jordan, Brookes, Cruz et al court then watch a rally by Republican Congresspersons Marjorie Taylor-Green and Matt Gaetz.

Apart from those who’re present to ask Gaetz if he’s a pedophile, the dimwitted crowd at those shindigs hanging on the every word of a person who’s peddled conspiracy theories about Jewish space lasers causing blazes back on Earth. Along with the bulls**t spewed by a supremely entitled bloke from whom you’d wouldn’t (or shouldn’t) buy a second-hand car.

Of course, I’ll be discredited by those with a contrarian view. For example, in the highly unlikely scenario he’d read this, Mo Brookes maybe moved to posit a defence along the lines of “Don’t listen to that clueless Strachan character!…. What does he know?!…. For a start of he places an ‘e’ in my surname which isn’t there!….. It’s Brooks, not Brookes, you English imbecile.”

An accusation I’d respond to by pointing out “I knew it was Brooks all along, Mo…. I was deliberately misspelling it to set up this exchange of dialogue within my prose….. You’re not the only devious one in the room, Morris!”…….. Blimey, I’m having imaginary arguments with the US representative for Alabama now…… You need to get more sleep, Gary lad!

Anyhow, good on Lindsey Graham for his responsible conduct in this episode. Proving not every GOP senator and congressperson is an irresponsible, science denying, selfish, inhumane cockwomble.

Hopefully these wise words via social media will save many American lives….. Incidentally, that’s your words, Lindsey. Not mine….. As Mo Brookes (sorry, Brooks) points out, don’t listen to a word I say – I talk a right load of old bollocks!!

That being said, at least I’ve been consistent in my observation about the steaming pile of excrement who continues to linger odiously on your parties shoe, Lindsey fella….. Your inconsistent behaviour towards Trump highlighted by evident contrary behaviour exhibited since the below advocation in May 2016, a few months before his election victory.

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