Upon entering the living room in Chez Strachan on the morning of 14th February, I was greeted by an unexpected audible ping. With it being Valentines Day, the poet within me romanticised this aural distraction may’ve emanating from Cupid’s bow string. Its source the forceful triggering an arrow in my direction; a gesture of amour…
Category: Spoof News Stories
Parody news articles
Pigeon English
Overnight, during a particularly disturbing slumber, my night visions incorporated scenes of being imprisoned in a Turkish jail, similar to that experienced by Billy Hayes in 1978 movie Midnight Express. Unlike the character played by Brad Davis who attempted to smuggle hashish out of Turkey, though, my misdemeanour causing deprivation of liberty was smuggling Pontefract…
Through The Round Window
During the French Revolution in the late 18th century the nation’s queen, Marie Antoinette, was attributed to’ve displayed a glaring lack of humanity, disdainfully informing France’s starving populace to quell hunger pangs by eating cake. I’d doubt any attempts to facilitate the Great French Bake Off came to pass on the back of the monarchs…
Your Sartre For Ten
Under current COVID-19 restrictions, the cliche of everyday being Groundhog Day has been mooted frequently. However this week, on 2nd February, marks the actual Groundhog Day. An occasion citizen’s of Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania, observe the behaviour of local groundhogs as they emerge from their burrows. In particular their reactions to that day’s meteorological conditions. Folklore decreeing:-…
Variety Show
Tonight a group of buddies and me will indulge in our inaugural quiz night of 2021. Facilitated by the miracle of Zoom software, the chairmanship skills of Scott Parker (of Northampton parish) and the creativity of it’s ne’er do well participants, these evenings ordinarily play out to a soundscape of laughter, live music and contestants…
An Overnight Ordeal
I’d a fractured slumber overnight; my disrupted sleep pattern proving as erratic as Mr Magoo’s driving skills. Falling asleep at 9pm, during an episode of Netflix drama ‘Unbelievable’, I woke around 12.40am disorientated, wondering why I was wearing a Scooby Doo fancy dress outfit. Footnote – A fractured slumber isn’t to be confused with a…
Take Sandwiches
I’m late to the laptop this morn. This delay consequential of yours truly undertaking three hours of ironing, along with tidying chez Strachan. My creative sojourn also slightly held back from being unable to locate the aforementioned device; this inconvenience resultant from forgetting where I’d hid laptop prior to bedtime. In the event you’re planning…
This Vale Of Tiers
As I wait at the literary starting blocks ever eager to type today’s blog, there’re rumours abound the UK government maybe planning to expand the current COVID tier system. Whether this happens, or not, learning of potential restrictions to my liberty got me thinking about what further edicts could possible befall citizens residing within the…
Cistern Broke?
This Sunday morning, I’m confronted with an infrequently faced affliction of bearing little interest in writing. In fact, I’d go as far as claiming, as things stand, yours truly would rather consume all three jars of incredibly hot chilli jam received as a Xmas gift than draft this prose. That being said, due to concerns…