Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

Flat

I’ve no proof last Tuesday evening’s incident in a Niagara Falls bar was borne out of malice. The potentially scarring act may well’ve been a misunderstanding; or perhaps an accidental oversight by its perpetrators. I’ll probably never get to know. I can be certain, though, that this occurrence caused a moment of unnecessary stress to its hapless victim. A visiting northern Englishman whose aspirations for the evening were simply to enjoy […]

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Life In An Episode of ‘Sorry!’

It’s Tuesday and I’m still afflicted by the catarrh laden cough I penned about in Sunday’s literary offering, Untuned Catarrh. A fact leading to my disenchantment growing ever stronger, as I’m still not able to get through the night without regularly waking myself by coughing up phlegm. Taking into account the overnight capriciousness of my middle-aged bladder, it’s fair to say my current sleep pattern is pretty erratic. This morning, on […]

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Armistice

Along with millions worldwide, I observed a two minute silence, marking one hundred and one years since guns fell silent in WWI. The anniversary of an armistice between the Allied countries and Germany – Ending a four year war which saw around 40 million military and civilian casualties. I wasn’t sure which surprised me more, learning of the sheer scale of human slaughter during the Great War, or the fact […]

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We’ve Got High Hopes

Today, I’ve had another venture west across the Pennine Hills, my third or fourth visit to the north west in a month. This time to pick my mum Maggie up from my sister Helen’s home in Macclesfield, where she’d spent a few days with her youngest offspring. A visit including mater’s attendance at a performance by the Macclesfield choir who count among its throng the sibling ten years my junior. […]

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Remembrance

John Maxwell Edmonds won’t be too familiar a name to most people. Despite this, some of the English classicist’s compositions will be instantly recognisable to millions around the world. In particular around this time of year, when we remember our fallen in worldwide services of remembrance. The Stroud born poet is celebrated for his moving and thought provoking epitaphs. Amongst his more famous work he is attributed with the widely […]

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Untuned Catarrh

In the last few days I’ve been afflicted by a catarrh laden cold. This rare malaise seeing your’s truly’s frequent chesty hacks manifesting with such ferocity I wouldn’t be surprised if they started from my feet. The bark then gaining momentum as it works upwards through my innards, chest, windpipe and mouth where it’s emitted with such power my toenails and testicles have been amongst the items orally discharged. It’s infrequent […]

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A Rose For The Garden of England

Tomorrow, my daughter Rachel leaves her childhood home in Leeds, moving into a flat with her partner in Kent. The town of Tunbridge Wells becoming her new home, in the county whose aesthetic beauty earns it the moniker of ‘The Garden of England’. What amazes me is how many people seem to know she’s moving to Kent; lots of individuals have recently muttered it in my direction while walking past […]

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Beside The Seaside, Beside The Sea

I’m back in East Ardsley, West Yorkshire, after an enjoyable few days break residing in a lodge at Heysham on the Lancashire coastline. This pleasant enough town, an Irish Sea port for ferries to the Isle of Man and Ireland, which although accessible by road not wardrobe I’ve been unreliable assured is twinned with Narnia. Thankfully, though, there was less snow, lions and witches in Heysham than Narnia. When I say […]

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