After a couple of years in early retirement, I am contemplating a return into the employment world. This despite having lots of pastimes to fill my days, and huge uncertainty it is the correct lifestyle avenue to embrace.
Anyhow, with this in mind, I have tentatively put out some feelers, researching opportunities current eddying around the part-time employment pool. A task not really aided by the fact I have no real idea which role would play the carrot to my donkey, luring me from this retirement comfort zone.
Endeavouring to see if this metaphorical orange root vegetable is out there, I joined an online recruitment company called Indeed. A friendly enough bunch who has spent the last month or so filling my email inbox with a whole raft of employment opportunities.
Some of these potentially worth an application. Other correspondences, though, serving up roles which bear no (or little) relevance to the job description criteria entered into the site’s search filter.
Among the ‘no goes’ were emails requesting I apply to work as judo instructor, fast-food delivery driver, royal lifestyle reporter, and minder for animated kids’ icon Peppa Pig…. Incidentally, I made the last role up; the minders job has already been filled.
Anyhow, I was highly amused to receive this email last week. A genuine request for me to apply for an upcoming seasonal role, which (if I applied and was successful) would keep me busy in the lead up to Christmas: –
“Hi Gary,
Your experience at HSBC could make you a good match for the Father Christmas | Seasonal Temporary Work opportunity. If you’re interested, please submit a quick application.”
“Hi Gary,
Your experience at HSBC could make you a good match for the Father Christmas | Seasonal Temporary Work opportunity. If you’re interested, please submit a quick application.”
So, there you have it. My experience working in IT for a multinational bank has nurtured my employment skillset to such an extent, in middle-age, a recruitment agency think I could maybe pull off the role of Santa Claus.
Footnote – Please note I wrote ‘I could maybe pull off the role of Santa Claus’… Not ‘I could pull off Santa Claus’, which would be an altogether different role… One I would definitely NOT apply for!
Maybe Indeed agency might be able to push more of this seasonal labour my way. For instance, not only supplying me with employment as Father Christmas on the month prior to Yuletide, but the Easter Bunny on the build up to Easter festivities.
Would I really want to work as Father Christmas, though?
After all, it seems to me that a curmudgeon like GJ Strachan would illicit far more cons than pros from the gig.
Cons: –
It would be bloody noisy;
It’ll be darned hot in that Santa suit
The white beard would be tickly;
I don’t imagine the pay is up to much;
Mrs Claus might be a real old harridan like a former boss I had in the bank;
I’m bound to meet ungrateful, spoiled kids, which would really irritate me;
I’m bound to get covered in snot, chocolate and/or spilled fruit drinks;
Pros: –
Erm…. I can’t think of any… That’s it, there is no way that role is gonna coax me out of retirement.
Oh, and if you are wondering why I don’t apply for jobs similar to the IT Service Management roles I worked in for decades… My short and simple answer to that is I would rather work as Father Christmas than plunge back into that world.
