Probably…….

Yesterday afternoon, while rapaciously quenching my thirst with a chilled Carlsberg lager during dinner preparation, my eyes were drawn to a message on the beer can announcing ‘Cheers to football this summer‘.

How kind I thought upon reading such magnanimousness. This sight of a Danish brewery wishing the UK’s national sport goodwill over the months of June, July and August going someway at negating GJ Strachan’s cynicism surrounding global corporations being cold, disingenuous and bereft of heart.

Footnote – That being said, I’m unsure how much of Carlsberg’s goodwill remained after England defeated the Danes in the Euro 2020 football semi-finals.

Anyhow, spotting this message lead me to conclude capitalism does indeed care about its customers and their favoured pastimes. They’re not just in it to make s**t loads of cash for its shareholders, yours truly perhaps naively concluded.

Actually, I’ve just realised, I hold shares in both personal portfolio and my pension. Get back to being mercenary corporate world…. Never mind this pandering to the customer – I’ve got bloody bills to pay in my retirement!!

Seriously, though, It may only be the size of the Grinch’s, I further thought, but it appears there’s a heart beating somewhere within the oak lined boardrooms of some multi-national corporations.

Of course, I’m not being serious when commenting Carlsberg had seduced me with this message of goodwill. Their marketing departments well-meaning message to footy not rendering me as putty in their sweaty hands.

Yours truly not conned into thoughts of “How nice those folks at Carlsberg are for raising a glass in celebratory cheer towards my favourite sport…… I must thank them by dashing to the offie to procure a box of their reasonably palatable wares”

No, what I really thought was “How odd!”

I admit I’ve absolutely no experience in the copywriting/product marketing field, and despite my sneers to the contrary that it appeared random, I know ‘Cheers to football this summer’ was part of a campaign to boost Carlsberg’s sales during this summer’s Euro 2020 tournament…… There’s obviously a strategy behind the move – Clearly, it didn’t just appear courtesy of an arbitrary soundbite from a rogue copywriter.

That being said, I couldn’t help ponder whether merely wishing the sport well would significantly increase product sales. It certainly didn’t raise any urge in me to augment Carlsberg stocks in my beer fridge.

I buy the product because it’s probably (an adverb oft used in it’s marketing) the best of the non-premium (around 4% proof) lagers available in local supermarkets. Unlike Carling Black Label, it’s palatable enough – Also, it also won’t get me a***holed anywhere near as quickly as stronger more flavoursome beers of which I’m sometimes keen. Consequently, I find it a decent enough liquid accompaniment when prepping/cooking an evening meal.

Actually, maybe I’ve just stumbled upon the next Carlsberg advertising tagline – “Carlsberg, it won’t get you absolutely shitfaced while you’re cooking a spaghetti bolognese!….. Well, unless you drink too much of it!”….. I’ll tweet their marketing guys later to see what they think.

Probably (that word again), though, there’s a chance I’m overthinking things. It’s not unfathomable the Danish brewer’s message was simply that….. A genuine goodwill message.

Carlsberg’s words designed to merely spur on England, Denmark or whoever the heck their customers had nailed their colours to supporting. Subsequently, their bona fide, well-meaning locutions are completely undeserving of my unbridled cynicism.

These white on green can filling words not delivered as any part of a marketing strategy. Instead, simply the heartfelt sentiments of a company keen to support a sport whose fans significantly boost profit margins – Particularly during summer tournaments like Euro 2020.

Perhaps your deep mistrust in most things needs addressing, Strachan!!

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