Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

GJS 1-0 Comfort Zone (After Extra Time)

I’ve just arrived back home after my two day sojourn south to Bedfordshire where I performed some of my writing to an audience of ladies and gents from Barton-le-Clay village. judging from the congregation’s reaction, this inaugural attempt at orating my work proving to be a highly successful undertaking by yours truly.

My ‘script’ the yarns I’d written during a recent adventure across the pond, published on my website writesaidfred.org upon menu page A Canadian Odyssey, being well received by attendees at Barton Methodist Church.

Despite the success of my readings, sales of my merchandise went badly. Consequently, I’ve returned home with 4200 Gary Strachan fridge magnets, 3000 Gary Strachan knitted toilet roll covers and a 25000 Gary Strachan commemorative mugs…….. That being said, my audience snapped up the commemorative locks of my back hair. which sold like hot cakes!!…. Although, admittedly not as pleasant a cuppa accompaniment as the cakes.

Unlike the previous two occasions which I broached in my monologue The Faithful Departed , my third venture into a kirk in six days was a pleasant occasion. An event taking myself out of my comfort zone; a behavioural trait I’m resolved to undertaking more frequently following January’s heart attack.

Bearing in mind this was my first attempt at performing readings of my essays, I’m delighted with how it went. There were few (if any) boos emanating from my collective audience, no eggs thrown, or, indeed, sights of placards bearing the words ‘Kill the Heretic!’. Consequently, I was made to feel welcome in this village 150 miles south of my home; a contributing factor in settling my nerves whilst delivering the narratives.

At the conclusion of my speaking, one lady posited that my travel blogs reminded her of US writer Bill Bryson’s publishings, which gave me a huge fillip post-oration. That being said, I should’ve checked she didn’t think Bryson’s essays were garbage prior to assuming it was a compliment.

As a result of the ventures success, I’m contemplating creating podcasts of my daily journals. Am online medium utilising my hybrid Yorkshire/Geordie accent to deliver my words of whimsy or, on darker days, locutions of despair. However, I’d need to check, prior to embarking on that particular conduit for my work that my Yordie dialect is conducive to delivery via that medium.

I’ve got to admit, the lift I got from hearing people laughing at words/situations which were notions plucked from deep within my neurological highways provided yours truly with a huge buzz. Subsequently, I’d love to embark on this project again.

Wavering any fee or expenses, my aim of this literary performance not for financial gain or recompense, moreover to challenge myself and experience the buzz consequential from the appreciation of my prose.

I met many warm, supportive and interesting individuals at Barton Methodist Church on Tuesday afternoon. One was old Theodore who informed me my oration was the finest dialogue that’d ever passed through his hearing aid…… A comment that warmed the very cockles of my heart until I found out he’d only got the bloody thing two hours prior to my performance!

On returning home my mum was so eager to know how I got on with my new project that as soon as I walked through the front door she submitted “We’re gonna have to get a new carpet for the spare room. The one that’s in there now is a right bleeding mess!!”

Categories: Blogs, fiction, humour, Postcards from

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.