Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

Tag Archive for ‘essay’

Judith & The Marigolds

This morning I undertook a couple of hours garden maintenance at Mrs S senior’s gaff. My work including the severe cutting back of an out of control clematis, along with enhancing chromatic outdoor views by potting up a bunch of bedding plants. This liberal hacking of clematis exposing a previously veiled pyracantha; my labour allowing it’s evergreen leaves to once again experience the warmth of solar rays. That being said, […]

Continue Reading →

Co-op Horsing It

“They don’t know what to charge!!” – A go to expression used by my mother when paying for, or witnessing, what she deems to be extortionately priced goods or services. I’m unsure if this is a Yorkshire colloquialism used by the Tyke lass, or a saying utilised throughout the UK; however it’s use to describe overpriced products always intrigued me. After all, they (the seller) clearly did know what to charge, […]

Continue Reading →

An Essay, I Say

Lethargy is today’s watchword for GJ Strachan. Feeling like he’s undergone an energy suction procedure, the vitality felt in recent days following a break with long term buddies currently evades him. The northern Englishman feeling as spent as his wife’s wardrobe budget, but pragmatic enough to know it’s a fleeting fatigue which’ll no doubt abate post-slumber. As an aside, if the Dulux paint chart is to believed, today the sky has […]

Continue Reading →

Payback Time

This morning saw my first gym circuit session since an over-indulgent weekend celebrating a mates retirement in Bedfordshire. An exercise class my three nights of decadence turned into a GJ Strachan perspire-fest. My avariciousness within the shadows of the Chiltern Hills coming back to haunt me in the shape of the little known medical affliction called waterfall forehead. Its aesthetically  displeasing symptoms including a sufferers hairline producing a Niagara Fallsesque […]

Continue Reading →

As Sure As Eggs Is Eggs

I’m back in Leeds after a three night hiatus in Dunstable in the company of two old friends; brothers in arms of whom I wrote yesterday in Pineapple Days. A sojourn, which among the events arranged, saw me re-united with several former work mates/colleagues during a surprise retirement presentation for a long-standing buddy of mine (Alan). The event an informal get together at the offices of the financial institution who’d employed my […]

Continue Reading →

A Pain In The Water Butt

This morning, there’s a spherical amber vision just about identifiable through West Yorkshire’s hazy cloud cover. This sight, scarcely witnessed of late courtesy of the seemingly endless attendance of foreboding nimbus aerosols, a token Zeusian gesture to remind UK citizens we’re not hallucinating. It is indeed summertime! The god of the skies, perhaps sending us a timely reminder that “Yes, I know it’s summer and I’ve no problem furnishing you […]

Continue Reading →

Why? Why? Why?

I’ve felt physically drained over the past few days. Witnessing this constant rain seemingly bearing the same energy depleting qualities which Samson experienced after a trip to the barbers. The Nazarite’s flowing locks, which initially attracted him to his beau Delilah, the fabled source of his immense strength. Their removal rendering him vulnerable to enemies, as well as less inclined to respond positively when his barber asked him “Something for […]

Continue Reading →