He’s Off Again!

Erudite, engaging, enlightening and interesting. Four words that begin with the letter ‘e’ (apart from interesting) that can be used to describe writer/comedian, clever shite and man with at least 4 ‘O’ levels Stephen Fry.

A guy who royally entertains (blimey, another word that begins with ’e’) us in many a different guise. Be it with his literature, lectures, presenting or giving Bear Grylls a piggy back round dangerous terrain.

Incidentally, the last part relating to the intrepid Mr Grylls wasn’t a euphemism…….. Bloody hell, I’ve just noticed that both of their surnames are methods of cooking; what an amazing coincidence!…. Or perhaps not.

The reason I bring up the sickeningly talented Mr Fry is that his twitter account, that regularly enlivened (those ‘e’ words keep coming!) our sad existence, is currently de-activated.

The Hampstead born ‘Jack of all trades and master of all’ took this decision following trolling tweets after he cracked a joke about a BAFTA winners dress sense, while presenting at the awards ceremony.

The recently added 11th commandment of ‘Thou shalt not offend anyone to obtain a laugh. Or wear elbow patches on tweed jackets’ had been shamelessly broken by Mr Fry.

His punishment for a joke, that was not meant maliciously, being numerous telling offs from the upholders of the 11th commandment…….. Although, the criticism of the elbow patches is right enough I suppose.

Not that the presenter (who I believe is atheist) will worry overly about the religious element of the commandments. He would, though, I assume adhere to most (if not all, apart from the 11th one) because they are acts of common decency, not the result of any religious want.

As I understand, there is no monopoly for religious types appertaining to their sole use of the commandments. I’m no expert, but for those non believers reading this I’m pretty sure you’re welcome not to covet your neighbour’s ass and the other nine things passed down on Moses stones.

From my experience, plenty of religious people are less inclined to adhere to the commandments than some non-believers. I’ve written before of a guy I used to work with who was a regular church goer, but it didn’t negate him from being a deeply unpleasant individual…. What is the point of that?!

Incidentally, I’m not sitting in judgement myself here. I’m not in the position to arrogantly tell other people how to live their lives. I am, after all, as flawed as the next man.

To clarify, when I say “flawed as the next man”, I’m referring to a quote admitting weakness in the book King Breaker……. Not that we have a particularly flawed bloke delivering clothes to our door from the Next store!

I loathed to sit in judgement of the Next courier, I’m not judgemental remember. Saying that, though, he could do with a shave the scruffy get!!

I dislike judgemental people, particularly those who are as (or even more) flawed than the people they deem themselves fit to judge.

Some may label me a hypocrite as it appears I’m judging the judgemental people, which makes me one of the people I’m criticising.

To those people I would utter the old Viking saying “Ne’er the breach of tatties afore a storm!” …. I’ve no idea what it means, but I find it a handy distraction when I haven’t got anything sensible or informed to say! ……. You’ll not be surprised to hear I use it regularly.


I know Stephen Fry won’t ever read this, but if he did I’d say “Please, re-open your twitter account lanky! Don’t let the enforcers of the 11th commandment win (apart from the elbow patch bit)!”

Additionally, I’d say “Don’t forget the 12th commandment…… Thou shalt make a 5th series of the comedy Blackadder. So tell Richard Curtis and Ben Elton to get their arses in gear.”

To close I’d just like to say “Ne’er the breach of tatties afore a storm!”

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