Last week yours truly participated in an online Christmas quiz with buddies from Gateshead. My contribution to this entertaining clambake was a round of intentionally absurd ‘True or False’ questions. Fictional catechisms not to be taken seriously and written with an intention to raise a smile from my follow participants.
Thankfully, I achieved my goal. These made up queries and answers, like my peers with their rounds, proving a successful addition to our pre-yuletide celebration. Below are the fenquiries (with answers in bold) I presented on the occasion… Merry Christmas everyone!!
- True or False – During a cameo appearance in the movie Home Alone 2, serial liar Donald Trump actually told the truth when giving Kevin McAllister directions to the Plaza hotel lobby? True
- True or False – During the festive period in 1973, I stole our Ian’s missing Terry’s Chocolate orange segments. Not poltergeists as I’d mendaciously claimed at the time? True
- True or False – Cliff Richard suffered an outer body experience while performing ‘Mistletoe & Wine’ on the 1988 Christmas edition of ‘Top of the Pops’, False – The event occurred during his performance of ‘Summer Holiday’ in a 1960’s show.
- True or False – Statistics show, despite barely anyone owning a nutcracker, 78% of the British public persist in purchasing shelled nuts for Xmas. The snack predominantly ending up binned without consumption? True
- True or False – Celebrity gardener Alan Titchmarch cooks his Christmas turkey in a compost heap partially fuelled by chef Jamie Oliver’s veg peelings? False – They are Heston Blumental’s peelings.
- True or False – Christmas trees became people’s chosen decorative focal points when it was decided wrapping fairy lights around an arga oven would result in electrical jeopardy? True
- True or False – When sitting down for his festive dinner Irish crooner Daniel O’Donnell wears all 13 of his Xmas sweaters? True
- True or False – On Christmas Day, Daniel O’Donnell ordinarily passes out from heat exhaustion halfway through his prawn cocktail starter? False – He normally expires during serving of the hors d’ oeuvres
- True or False – To make the occasion a little more festive, during a Rainbow yuletide gig in the 1970’s, drummer Cozy Powell played his drum set with giant cinnamon sticks? False – He used turkey legs as his drumsticks.
- True or False – After hearing his red-nosed reindeer singing ‘All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth’, last Christmas Eve Santa briefly interrupted his Turkish deliveries so Rudolph could undergo affordable tooth surgery? True
- True or False – TV chef James Martin entertains his Christmas Day guests by juggling saucepans of turkey gravy prior to serving his yuletide feast? True
- True or False – James Martin’s Christmas Day guests normally have the ignominy of having to eat their meal covered in turkey gravy? False – James’s far too accomplished as a pan juggler for spillage to occur.
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