Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

Tag Archive for ‘comedy’

Careful What You Wish For, Again!

This morning yours truly woke to the sound of clanking ladders emanating from the bottom of our cul-de-sac. Not being inquisitive enough to poke my head through my bedroom curtains and look, I’ve no idea which company the perpetrators of the racket represented, or indeed what task they were undertaking. Hearing two male voices, though, it appear the noise was a joint effort. Unless, of course, it was one man […]

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The Second Miracle of Headingley

Prior to World War II (WWII), World War I (WWI) went by the moniker of the Great War. For a conflict which bore absolutely nothing great about it, a misnomer on the most grotesque scale. Calling it a war is even questionable in some commentators eyes. After all, the obscenity of some warfare strategies employed between 1914-1918 were little short of serving troops up as cannon fodder. Less a war, moreover […]

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Wherever I Lay My Sowester (That’s My Home)

This morning, I’m afflicted by an ordinarily infrequent case of writers block. A rare creative imposter which I’m currently unable to vanquish, despite sitting in a White Rose Centre coffee house indulging in a spot of people watching. A pastime which ordinarily manifests ideas aplenty, but thus far hasn’t provided GJ Strachan with any noteworthy notions for a narrative topic. The mall’s retail outlets bustling with members of the West […]

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Expecting The East Ardsley Inquisition

Wednesday AM – After today’s habitual cordial exchange of “Good morning.” on entering the kitchen, my mum held out her hand to show me a 5mm white disc and questioned “Is this one of your tablets, Gary?” This the first of what I expect will be numerous maternal enquiries of the day. That short seven word question signalling the commencement of Margaret Strachan’s daily inquisition. This a salvo of catechisms which when […]

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Avenues & Alleyways

This time tomorrow I’ll be Leeds General Infirmary (LGI) in situ undergoing an exploratory angiogram procedure. A followup op to an investigative treadmill stress test I underwent a couple of months ago. That being said, I’m not overly daunted that in twenty four hours time my radial artery will be punctured to allow a camera to examine the highways and byways around my coronary arteries. Why should I be?….. I […]

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Stealth

As I commence this second narrative of the day, I’m sitting in an eatery on the food/drink mezzanine area at the White Rose Shopping Centre. Around twenty minutes ago, I became the recipient of a sharp new haircut; consequently, I’m now bereft of the bizarre kiss curl that’d become my recent unwelcome fringe trademark. This unintended hair accoutrement giving me a look of an out of shape, but less anxious, […]

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Long Live The King!!

It’s another humid day in the West Yorkshire metropolis I affectionately call home. For the third occasion this week, I’m penning my daily narrative at a coffee house within the White Rose Shopping Centre (WRSC) located south of the city. Once again, the audio companions to my penmanship are the muffled conversations of Costa customers and day-to-day murmurs of WRSC patrons roaming the shopping mall in search of bargains and/or […]

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