Captain Concoct

While scribing today’s journal, yours truly has one eye on a live BBC stream showing our ‘beloved’ prime minister, Boris Johnson, peddling another catalogue of disingenuous apologies for his involvement in #partygate.

Footnote – If you’re interested the eye witnessing this odious individuals unreliable and insincere contrition is my left. That being said, if I’d have utilised my starboard peeper, the anger manifested from watching this entitled buffoon’s mealy-mouthed offerings would’ve reached a similar high plateau.

Further Footnote – For the uninitiated, Partygate is a title given to the shady episode surrounding UK government and staff members who felt they didn’t need to follow strict COVID lockdown protocols they deemed the rest of the country should.

As GJ Strachan writes, the bumbling peroxide haired old Etonian’s brushing over the newly published Sue Gray report into Downing Street partying during lockdown. After the reprehensible toff was earlier this week unable to stop Ms Gray publishing her report (allegedly), instead he decided to provide her approx 40 page document the contempt he reserves for a majority of Britain’s proletariat.

Displaying the insincerity of a man whose only sorry because he got caught, Bozza assures us he’s very sorry. However, denies misleading parliament as everything he’d previously stated was his understanding of the facts at the time; and, as such, delivered in good faith…… Yet another lie?!…… Answers on a stamp addressed envelope to:-

John Craven’s Newsround, London, W12 8QT

Bozington (as nobody apart from me calls him) deems his crime as unworthy of resignation. Consequently, unless Tory backbenchers grow a back bone and vote in enough numbers to trigger a vote of no confidence in Captain Concoct, the UK’s populace’s stuck with him and his cabal of sweaty, weedy and cross Eton cohorts.

Witnessing Johnson’s overt hubris, repeated untruths, lack of genuine contrition and his blindly loyal lieutenants crawling so far up his posterior they can almost taste his Harmony hairspray is absolutely enraging.

Having no allegiance to any one party, ordinarily I avoid scribing about politics. To my mind, there’s good and bad ideological notions from both ends of the political spectrum; consequently, I don’t usually hold strong opinions in support of any one legislation faction.

However, in the prevailing political zeitgeist, where levels of falsities are so blatantly and unashamedly spouted at will, the condescension of our current government is thoroughly galling.

Bereft of serious political opposition these entitled individuals, whose public school tie and crest afford tremendous privilege, fast tracking them to government roles many aren’t up, no longer even attempt to hide their disdain and contempt for Joe and Josephine Public.

In addition to having one eye on Captain Concoct’s stream of verbal cack, I’m otherwise engaged looking at my laptop screen. I’m occasionally being diverted by my buddy Sarah who’s ironing a few feet to my right. Ossett finest’s laundry maintenance sporadically interrupted by wonderfully brisk observations about the PM’s integrity…… Or, more accurately, should I say his lack of probity.

Sazington (as also no one calls her but me) on good form with a curse fest of thoughts on this sceptred isle’s prevailing political landscape. The Yorkshire lass utilising a number of locutions from her well populated profanasaurus to relay observations about this nation’s untrustworthy leader…… Contritionless c*** was amongst my favourites!

Captain Concoct – “Bluster…. bulls**t….. Got Brexit done…. More bulls**t….. I wasn’t there…. Blah….. Bluster…..”

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