After a few days where over the top absurdity’s tarried the sentences and paragraphs of my literary concepts, today I’ve vowed to pen a more profound narrative. Consequently, Saturday’s aspiration is to paint a belles-lettres; a lexicological magnum opus which’ll tap so far into the soul of it’s reader, on concluding the piece, they’ll feel moved to exclaim “What the bloody hell does belles-lettres mean?!”

Apologies if the word bloody offends. It appears I’ve inadvertently utilised the profane before I could even get to the profound.

As I start this paragraph, I’ve absolutely no idea which words of wisdom I’ll impart, proving to my readership I’m versatile enough to write with heartfelt emotion. Dismissing any thoughts I’m a one trick pony, with only the wherewithal for creating the whimsical and absurd.

An accusation I’d refute by arguing my literary portfolio, although predominantly jocular, contains copious examples of stark melancholy. In particular, surrounding my battle with depression and family cancer battles.

Mulling over today’s writing strategy, I’d notions that devising a thought-provoking philosophical observation could perhaps be classed as profound….. Especially, I suppose, if the advocacy was enlightening and innovative enough.

Alternatively, it maybe possible to relay any pretentious nonsense. Frowning patronisingly at any ‘thicky’ who wasn’t intellectually deep enough to interpret your erudite locutions. A scenario playing out as an emperor’s new clothes version of penmanship…… Trust me, it works!!

For example, relaying the just made up ‘philosophical’ advice of “Beware the Lambs of Wrath. They take no prisoners!” Absolute nonsense, of course. However if you blag the advocacy with enough confidence, backing your ‘words of wisdom’ with “Don’t tell me you don’t get it!…. Even Nidgy understands it, and he reads his paper upside down!” and it’s maybe possible to sell this lexicological sand to the Arabs.

Footnote – If you haven’t a mutual acquaintance named Nidgy, avoid utilising that moniker in the ruse…… Use the name Macca instead…… Unless you haven’t a mutual acquaintance named Macca…… In which case utilise Jacko……. Unless you haven’t a mutual acquaintance named Jacko….. In which case…… Well, I’m sure you get the picture!!

Incidentally, in the unlikely event someone queries the meaning of “Beware the Lambs of Wrath. They take no prisoners!”, it’s prudent to have an answer prepared. If yours truly gets asked for it’s connotation, I tend to suggest it means avoid complacency in the company of small cute animals. After all, they can be amongst the most dangerous

Who knows my random fictional adage may one day become recognised as a genuine philosophical promulgation. It’s unlikely, but Einstein said that before he gained kudos for his cryptic observation “Black Holes would be easier to study if they’d street lighting.”

Anyhow, away from the intentionally absurd adage about the Lambs of Wrath. My use of which, undermining aspirations this narrative avoided residence in a gutter named inane. To seek redemption, I should really think of a genuine philosophical quote to write that wrong..

I know, how about “Avoid complacency in company of small cute animals. After all, they can be amongst the most dangerous.“…… Genius!!