Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

Step Away From The Edge!

This morning, an Ontarian fall chill greeted me as I jumped groggily from my bed. The warmth of yesterday, which was my weather companion as I meandered the harbour and town centre of Westport, Ontario, a distant memory as I stood shivering in my undies checking my phone.

Prior to announcing I was awake by belching cacophonously, I scratched my head that was still fluffy from last nights events in a Brockville pub, where my Canadian hosts and me attended a music jam night.

The Canadian military police (MP) lapel badge I was given as a memento by one of my hosts here in Brockers (as it’s not known by anyone) which is attached to my laptop bag in the bedroom corner also caught my eye.

Although not imparting me with any official policing powers here, or indeed anywhere else, wearing this badge on my lapel does give me the authority to inform the populous of Ontario to “Step away from the edge!”…… I’m unsure which edge the edict relates to, however they are powers which may come in handy during my vacation so will ensure I’ll keep it in my possession throughout.

Westport, about 40 minutes drive north west of my current location, is a beautiful little town. Although significantly quieter and less populated than fictional Amity island in the Jaws movies, for some reason this nautical Canadian port evoked notions of similarities with the resort policed with mixed success by Chief Brodie.

As I say, they were idiosyncratic comparisons as, apart from a well maintained harbour, Westport hasn’t a great deal in common with Peter Benchley’s fictional Atlantic seaboard town. However, there was enough in these erratic notions to stop me from going for a swim……. Well, that and the fact I had no swimming attire.

I’m not in possession of the facts as to whether Chief Brodie had the authority to tell Ontarians to “Step away from the edge!” However, if you didn’t Broders (can I call you Broders?) it sucks to be you!

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Yesterday evening’s music jam night at a Brockville pub saw the congregated audience being treated to three hours or so of talented amateur musicians displaying their considerable musicianship. Amongst them an incredibly talented 14 year old boy guitarist, along with a 13 year old girl singer/guitar player.

During these awe-inspiring performances I sat with friends of my Canadian hosts, attentively listening to the two youngsters and a host of adults displaying their musical wares. In between each performance we chewed the fat….. On reflection, with my recent heart history, I probably should’ve chosen a healthier pub meal!

Although my head is ‘woolly’ this morning that affliction was attained as a consequence of an entertaining evening in the company of numerous Canadians whose geniality to this capricious Englishman enhanced the overall experience.

Later today I’m venturing to the Ontarian town of Kingston to watch the performance of a play being stage managed by one of my hosts. The production a piece called Rabbit Hole…… In the event any of the actors get too close to the stage edge, I’m gonna wear my military police badge.

Categories: Blogs, fiction, humour, Postcards from

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