There was good news today for anyone who lives in a house that is built of predominantly glass when scientists revealed that there was actually no real reason why they cannot throw stones. “We have undertaken extensive research and discovered that as long they throw them away from their houses, people have spent years showing unnecessary restraint when it comes to rock hurling.” we were told by Arnold Harrison whose Scientific Proverb Research team made the discovery.
The news has been greeted with euphoria by many previously frustrated chuckers. “I am delighted” we were told by Dumbarton woman Joan McPherson. “For years my husband and I have longed to skim stones on nearby Loch Lomond, but because we live in a house that is mainly built of transparent amorphous solid material we have not dared to.” she added. “Now whether it is igneous, sedimentary or metamorphic we can pick up a rock and hurl it to our hearts content.” she went on
Mrs McPherson and her ultra competitive husband are now in training in an attempt to replicate the world skimming record set by American tourist Brad Forsyth in 2005. Mr Forsyth’s stone not only skimmed the full length of the 39 kilometre loch but it also returned back to him complete with 2 tickets for the musical ‘Les Miserable’ attached to it.