Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

Tag Archive for ‘weather’

Unreliable Forecasts

I’m unsure which weather app my wife Karen utilises on her smart phone. I do know, though, I’d love to live under the wall to wall sunshine which, on a daily basis, it promises to West Yorkshire’s residents. Predictions which, frustratingly, this summer have proved to be the very antithesis of what Zeus has actually bequeathed to the largest English county’s populous. Ma femme in convinced that the app isn’t […]

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Words That Nearly Rhyme With Microscopic

This morning, GJ Strachan awoke to solar rays, a fresh breeze and mystified why he was clad in a Scooby Doo fancy dress outfit. Although tired and distressed after watching Leeds Rhinos capitulate against Wigan yesterday evening, I’m pretty sure I retired to my slumber pit adorning my usual nighttime attire – A Piers Morgan onesie. Anyhow, as I’m pushed for time, I’ll leave that riddle to the animated hound […]

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A Pain In The Water Butt

This morning, there’s a spherical amber vision just about identifiable through West Yorkshire’s hazy cloud cover. This sight, scarcely witnessed of late courtesy of the seemingly endless attendance of foreboding nimbus aerosols, a token Zeusian gesture to remind UK citizens we’re not hallucinating. It is indeed summertime! The god of the skies, perhaps sending us a timely reminder that “Yes, I know it’s summer and I’ve no problem furnishing you […]

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His Name Is Rio

Meteorological inclemency may’ve spoiled a multitude of Bank Holiday plans for our sceptred isles populace, however the shrubs and bedding plants providing natures kaleidoscopic bounty in my garden have benefited no end. Looked through my dining areas bay window the euphorbia, aquilegia, forget-me-nots, forsythia, rhododendrons, azaleas et al seem to have doubled in size they were prior to the weekends relentless precipitation. Continuing to avert my gaze outside I can […]

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The George Bailey Years

I’m fairly reliably informed Leeds’ afternoon meteorological guest will be April showers. Precipitation no doubt welcomed with open arms by fields of arable crops and domestic spring flower beds. Flora and fauna whose exposure to almost uninterrupted Easter holiday sunshine exposing them to aridity akin to a human’s palate after ingesting ten Jacobs crackers in swift succession. I say fairly reliably informed in the previous paragraph as if truth be […]

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Faces in the Clouds

This morning I’m looking out from my recuperative pit at cloud formations in the east Leeds sky. Groupings of altostratus forms, each uniquely shaping, some of which to my mind’s eye bear a remarkable resemblance to people and/or objects. For instance, currently through the middle part of the bedroom window there’s a cloud shaping of The Simpson’s power plant boss Montgomery Burns’ head. His distinctive long woodpecker beak nose pointing […]

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Boss Hogg Day

The 2nd February is Groundhog Day. An occasion citizen’s of Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania, observe the behaviour of local groundhogs as they emerge from their burrows. In particular their reactions to that day’s meteorological conditions. Folklore decreeing:- If it’s cloudy on first leaving their burrows spring will arrive before the vernal equinox. If it’s sunny then the groundhog will retreat into the burrow after seeing its shadow. Consequently, wintry conditions will prevail […]

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