Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred

Off The Wall Essays From Deep Within A Capricious Mind

Tag Archive for ‘fictional writing’

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I’ve been sitting here in a south Leeds coffee house for around an hour and only just managed to commence today’s narrative. Admittedly this is a self-inflicted delay driven by having temporary access to free shopping centre wifi network connectivity which is far more performant than back in my East Ardsley abode. The faster response times giving me the opportunity to undertake more data intensive tasks as a priority. The […]

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Wanna Buy A Lawnmower, Guv?!

GJ Strachan had a productive morning today. A much needed defrost of my mother’s freezer, followed by two hours of garden maintenance meaning he sat down to lunch with a warm sense of accomplishment. I’m not sure when Mrs S senior last defrosted the freezer, however judging from the amount of ice, which was roughly the same volume as the iceberg which sank the Titanic, I’d guess it was well over […]

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Oh, Gino

I commence this essay sitting in the Costa coffee shop within the Next building at The Springs Retail Park, Leeds; a recently built construction which also incorporates a Gino D’Acampo*** restaurant. **** – Or Gino D’Campingstove as my spouse, with her quirky tic of mispronouncing celebrity surnames, incorrectly calls him….. Gino D’Acampo not to be confused with Gino D’Compo the elderly wellington boot wearing West Yorkshire chef with a penchant […]

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I’m Dan Rather….

I’m lounging unceremoniously on an arm chair in my mother’s dining room as I pen this prose. Outside’s solar rays producing a Super Trouper like beam, highlighting the recently unkempt lawn and borders which for weather or health reasons I’ve neglected for the last two weeks. I’ve one eye on a corner of the room where a catchup broadcast of ‘Countryfile’ plays out on TV. My other eye is on […]

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Avenues & Alleyways

This time tomorrow I’ll be Leeds General Infirmary (LGI) in situ undergoing an exploratory angiogram procedure. A followup op to an investigative treadmill stress test I underwent a couple of months ago. That being said, I’m not overly daunted that in twenty four hours time my radial artery will be punctured to allow a camera to examine the highways and byways around my coronary arteries. Why should I be?….. I […]

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Perils of Being Overly Affable

“I’m glad you found it…… It’s awful when you can’t find a book!” A well-meaning, yet idiosyncratic comment relayed last week by Mrs Strachan senior on hearing I’d managed to acquire a thus far elusive copy of the book ‘celebrating’ TV magazine show Sunday Brunch. The above tome standing at number three on my son Jonathon’s birthday wish list. The holy grail I’d sought for two weeks; a search not […]

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Avoiding The Eurovision Express

It was the Eurovision Song Contest last Saturday evening. A smorgasbord of sing-song which in recent decades has allowed European nations (and recently our Australian cousins) their annual opportunity to humiliate the less creative end of the UK’s song writing industry. I’d like to think our continental cousin’s motives are deeply ingrained envy, born from a fact that over the last century Grande-Bretagne has kicked their collective asses in the […]

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