Gary Strachan – "Write" Said Fred
Whimsical observations from deep within an erratic mind
Yuletide preparations continue apace in chez Strachan. With nineteen more sleeps until St Nick breaks into my apartment with an immunity afforded from his benevolence, my pre-yuletide plans are well placed. Gifts are purchased, and arrangements to distribute the presents have been made. Additionally, a kind invite from friends to celebrate Christmas Day with them mean I’m... Continue Reading →
I have been stricken with COVID since Christmas Day; the virus an unintended festive present from my fragrant beau Sarah… Well, hopefully the pathogen wasn’t intentionally passed to me by the shapely West Yorkshire lass. Although with her mischievous sense of humour, I wouldn’t totally rule it out. The Ossett lady was similarly afflicted last... Continue Reading →
Below are a series of deliberately absurd quiz questions I wrote for a Christmas quiz night last year. These catechisms were written purely for comedic value and should not be taken seriously or viewed as factual fare... The 'answers' are shown below in bold:- True or False - Last year my brother asked for Christmas... Continue Reading →
It's the 1st January 2021, and the Christmas tree is down. I've no idea why it's down, I'd have thought it'd been glad to see the end of the 365 day s***show that concluded at midnight. I'll have to see if MiracleGro manufacture a horticultural version of prozac to pep the fella back up. Clearly,... Continue Reading →
Bank Holiday Monday brought forth an early reveille for yours truly. Given a 8am - 1pm window for my boiler's annual service, a rarely used watch alarm was set for 7.30am. Making my breakfast early on a cold, dark wintertide morn an activity I'd not undertaken for a long, long time. Footnote - All other... Continue Reading →
To the tune of Happy Christmas War Is Over...... With apologies to John Lennon:- So this is ChristmasAnd what have you doneA year dodging COVIDAnd not reading The SunAnd so this is ChristmasI hope you have funEven Boris and DonaldDespite being incredibly dumb A very merry ChristmasAnd a happy New YearLet's hope it's a good... Continue Reading →
After a perishable food shop yesterday afternoon, along with this mornings procurement/despatch of final gifts, I'm just about ready for the big occasion...... Incidentally, that's Christmas Day, not the Leeds Utd v Burnley football game on Boxing Day. The food shop undertaken after a 20 minute socially distanced queue to access the local Marks &... Continue Reading →
1) True or False - Last year, after my brother Ian asked for Christmas gifts of CD's by Spandau Ballet and a former X-Factor singer, along with a Mary Shelley book, on 25th December I presented him with Gold, Frankenstein and Olly Murs. - In the words of Spandau Ballet "This much is True" 2)... Continue Reading →
This morning, upon opening door 17 of the Strachan advent calendar, I was startled when confronted by a sharp creaking sound. Uncertain of its source, I concluded the noise had either emanated from my yet to warm up middle aged limbs, or was a consequence of rusty calendar door hinges. With the festive adornment's cardboard composition, I swiftly... Continue Reading →