Shouting It From The Rooftops

Resultant of a two night stay at Yellowtops Country Park earlier in the week, I’m in chipper spirits as I commence today’s narrative. Augmented brio levels, consequential of this North Yorkshire mini-break, catapulting my exhilaration levels to a plateau where I wanna announce this new found vigour from the rooftops.

Incidentally, for a plethora of reasons I won’t be exhibiting my elevated euphoria from the rooftops. For one thing, being without access to a pair of ladders, attaining the height of my home’s roof would be bloody difficult.

Another reason I’ll not be verbally yelling my contentment from a residence’s pinnacle is, even if I managed to reach the slate roofing, I’ve no wish to put my neighbours noses out of joint by creating a din from my lofty perch…… Or indeed a scene any other standing point; elevated or on terra firma.

As visual comedy goes a man falling to his demise from a roof he’d scaled to yell how happy he felt would be pure gold for witnesses. However, as much as I love raising a laugh, I draw the line at dying for my art.

Anyhow, my wingman, or should I say wingwoman (that’ll hopefully avoid any hate mail), for the break, Sarah, was similarly impressed by the residence and it’s lake view. The awestruck Gildersome lass so impressed by the accommodation’s luxury she admitted to feeling guilt about performing a trademark wee in the lodge’s hot tub.

Don’t get me wrong, the perceived shame didn’t stop her peeing, but at least (for once) she showed remorse for inappropriately passing water in our fancy residence’s outdoor bath.

Being a good judge of a person’s mood, it didn’t take me long after arrival to suss how happy my buddy was with our accommodation. Her gravy evident from the Gildie lady’s seemingly constant smile as we entered the den; along with her wearing a t-shirt adorning the words ‘I’m happy with this accommodation’. The garment looked sh**e, but what mattered most was her clear pleasure at thoughts of spending the next 48 hours in this wonderful temporary home.

The welcome greeting of champers and chocolates I’d pre-ordered as a surprise for our Monday afternoon arrival, was well received by my partner in crime. That being said, though, she didn’t share many of the choccies with me, the tight get. Although, on reflection, yours truly did manage to quaff more than my fair share of bubbly, which I’d pursued with far greater vigour than the confectionery.

Mercifully, the warmth afforded by the lodge’s hot tub made the chill from early April zephyrs bearable. Sarah and I spending many hours of our break outdoor bath in situ…. Although, upon learning she’d peed in the H2O, my period of time in the water was somewhat curtailed on the Monday evening…… As the saying goes “You can take the girl out of Gildersome………”

As I don’t bear grudges, Sarah’s misdemeanour didn’t overly ruin the moment, or indeed the break. The mini-vacation, which I booked as a belated Valentines present, a glowing success and well worth the expense.

That being said, she only bought me a packet of chocolate digestives on 14th February; an episode which I’m still narked about….. Actually, coming to think of it, I probably do bear grudges more than I’m prepared to admit!

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