As world death rates continue to escalate at alarming rates, courtesy of our COVID-19 viral nemesis, I read with interest today’s the birthday of comedian/performer Eric Idle. He the writer of Monty Python’s whimsical ditty Always Look On The Bright of Life; an adage which admittedly isn’t the easiest advocacy to adopt under current circumstances.

Some may inquire what’s the big deal about Idle’s song and my flimsy link to an ongoing pandemic. Further opining, it’d be fallacious in the extreme to file the ex-Python man’s life event under folder ‘coincidental’. Also deeming my connection between the South Shields born songwriter’s lament and the coronavirus as ironic would also be stretching facts.

In my defence, I’m not suggesting this comparison/connection is a hugely enlightening observation on my part. I merely thought you, my discerning reader, would appreciate an insight into my mindset and it’s erratic thought processes while hurtling through our uncertain present.

As an aside, I’ve spent part of my afternoon delivering essential comestibles to my estranged wife who’s housebound; and, after an egg exploded in her microwave, is also egg bound.

She was hugely appreciative of my gesture. However, as it doesn’t fit within her remit of villainising me, I suspect this gratitude won’t ever reach the ears of confidantes, who with great relish aid her the project Gary Strachan Is Evil …… Luckily, although bitter, I’ve got the class not to boast about my benevolence via blog. I’d never air my dirty washing in public!!…… Cough, cough!

Footnote – To clarify, the cough, cough above was of the ironic nature….. I’ve not developed early symptoms of the coronavirus….. I hope, anyhow!! 

During a quiet period this afternoon when filling in white space, I wrote a heartfelt sonnet. Prose whose moving content, erudition and the fact I got the rhyming spot on will no doubt move you to tears….. Not to mention reduce my readership by hundreds.

Ok, ok,…… I admit my literary offering was a half-witted limerick. Anyhow, despite the questionable literary quality of the poem, along with the questions it poses about my integrity, I still intend to share it…… Here goes:-

“An idiosyncratic bloke called Gary

Who when visiting tended to tarry

Renowned as being hirsute

Overly accommodating to boot

Needed more caution when deciding who he’d marry!

As a further aside, I’ve come to the conclusion I’m gonna have to stop watching the daily government briefings. Not so much from speaker updates, but more from the f***wit questions the gentlemen of the press feel moved to ask.

For example, one journo enquiring if there were lags in UK death statistics only a matter of minutes after the briefing had already announced that very fact…… If you’re not going to listen to the briefing what the f**k’s the point on being there!!

The same political editor then going on to ask if some police had been heavy handed in their dealings with broachers of social distancing advice.