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Lies, Damned Lies & Statistics

Twenty one years ago today my brood and I moved into this modest residence in the suburbs of east Leeds. Since that day it’s been this Englishman and his clan’s castle, a small plot on this green and pleasant island that we’ve been proud to call our home. Like all domestic abodes, it has […]

A Tangled Web We Weave

Weeding and pruning the garden borders at this time of year can be a real pain in the ass. Endeavouring to navigate the plethora of spiders webs without it’s creator ending up on your head or down your collar is a an acquired skill. Additionally, fall nuisance flies, miniscule of size but maximum of lughole itch, attempt […]

Domain Dismal

Only skin deep thy enchantment Vitriolic blight on caricature’s existence Masking habitual demeanour from dupable peers Gullible folks deceived of thy deportment ornery.   Loyalty blind amongst gang quartet Negativity prevails; irrational belief of mistreatment Harridan mater role model rancid Strangely proud of doll’s ne’er venturing from comfort zone   […]

Memories Born From Fragments

Yesterday afternoon, I started the unenviable task of tidying our garage. A tedious job that included the cleaning out of my toolbox, sorting screws into comparable sizes and pondering why, during my 29 year marriage, I’d gone to the unnecessary expense of purchasing two of every tool. Amongst the emotional re-acquaintances I made sorting my […]

Small Steps; Big Hearts

Yesterday afternoon, within the welcoming environment of our parents home, my sister Helen, her husband Steve, daughter Megan, my wife Karen and I cordially lunched with mater and pater. As ever, the quality of the buffet lunch didn’t disappoint. If food critic Egon Ronay had have been present he would have […]

Rhymes – Though Not For The Nursery

Parental Guidance – The author wishes to make it clear this parody prose contains naughty words that rhyme with duck, frastard and frollocks……. Well maybe not frollocks……… Baa Baa Black Sheep Have you any tuck No sir, no sir, have I f*** Adapted rhyme of wayward member of brood. The […]

A Decent Descent

Yesterday evening while scoured the enlightening world of social media, I was surprised by a post I spotted from my daughter Rachel, who’s currently residing in Canada. In the brief message she informed followers that she’d shortly be jumping out of a plane. A number of thoughts raced through my neurological corridors on […]

Plant Name Prompts

I commence this narrative sitting at the patio table in my sanctuaire de jardin. Scanning the cornucopia of colour exhibited in the garden borders, it has occurred to me that I’m unable to recollect the names of a few plants that bring much solace. It can’t be compared to the ignorance of a uninquisitive lothario who doesn’t […]

What Gives Aura & Aurai?

Patio heater; August eve What gives Aura and Aurai? Is the holidaying in Ibiza ad infinitum? Returning on wings of Ryan imminent? Dissenters tired of sustaining your cat, Watering begonias evermore my remit?   When will I see you again enquired trio degrees Addendum when will we share moments special […]